This Little Piggy

Wedding dinner. Groom’s family are Muslim. Caterer is told well in advance and repeatedly, “NO PORK!” The bill for this dinner is $17K.
Wedding party is served rice with pork sausage, potatoes with ham, salad with bacon, and ham sandwiches.
Hilarity did not ensue.
When confronted with the error, the caterer removed the offending dishes replacing only the salad. They now offer a $3000 refund but insist they are not obligated to refund the full cost.

First, what sort of buffoon agrees to pay 17 thousand dollars for a single fucking meal and doesn’t demand a full tasting of the entire menu in advance?

Second, what sort of caterer puts pork in every single thing on the menu? No vegetarian option? No beef? No chicken? Spam, spam, spam and more spam. Can’t help thinking some patriotic fan of Pam Geller saw the word Muslim in the notes and decided to strike a blow for the pork producers of America.

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6 Responses

  1. As your buddy Boston Paul might attest, given the state of today’s food industry, “pork” is more of a loose description.

    Thanks to factory farming, the resemblance between where today’s pork comes from and actual pigs is minimal, perhaps to the point of this wedding feast not offending Allah’s prohibition on pork. Religious misdemeanour at best.

  2. Fuck Muslims, and Jews too. Eat some goddamn ham. It’s a stupid-assed rule based on something that was totally forgotten two thousand years ago.

    • It’s a stupid rule as are all such religiously based bullshit but if I’m paying 17K for one fucking meal and I want nothing BUT all the brown M&M’s that were picked out in favour of Van Halen’s tour rider, then that’s what better be on that goddamn table.
      When I pay the piper I call the fucking tune, and for 17K no cunting caterer is going to tell me that my preference is based on archaic stupidity even if it is.

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