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Donald Trump

The blathering buffoon Donald Trump is going to moderate a GOP debate after Christmas. Bring on the birther questions. Here’s hoping Gary Busey and Meatloaf will be permitted follow ups.
As backward, stupid, pathetic, embarrassing and face-palming as the slate of Republican candidates daily demonstrates themselves to be, and as ignorant, arrogant and unjustifiably certain as Trump has always been, there’s something both infinitely appalling and perfectly appropriate about this set-up. This desperately power-hungry gang of idiots, liars, cheaters, god wallops and adulterers absolutely should determine the nominee on a season of The Apprentice.

“Herman, whether you banged that woman or not everyone thinks you did. Herman, you’re fired.”

“Michelle, you’re a bible thumping moron. There is no embassy in Iran. You’re fired.”

Perry, ‘Oops’ is no explanation for brainless incompetence. You’re fired.”

“Newt…your name is Newt. And you’re a lying, racist piece of shit. I’m in no position to say anything about fucking around on your wives but you’re fired.”

“Santorum. I Googled you. You’re fired.”

And then, in the season finale, Trump can fire Ron Paul and Jon Huntsman (who only managed to stay in the game because no one noticed him), and declare himself the candidate.

Anyone wanna bet Sarah Palin gets nominated from the convention floor?

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7 Responses

  1. That Trump should have another turn driving the GOP clown car around the mountain pass with no guardrails, icy roads, no brakes and a few chickens flying around in the car makes sense to me.

    Huntsman refuses to attend. He’d better stop making sense (for a republican) or the teabaggers are liable to beat him with pointed sticks and march on his house with pitchforks and torches.

  2. Is this for real? Trump moderating??? That’s like having Cousinavi as your AA sponsor.

    Has somebody told Trump that being moderator means you get to say less than anyone else on stage? If they did, I’m sure he’d change his mind awful fast.

    With Cain out now, I can’t rule out him getting back in, especially if The Apprentice isn’t filming before the election.

    • Oddly enough, today I heard Trump say that if he isn’t happy with the Republicans’ choice, he may run as an Independent.

      Not a shocking prediction by any means, but I’m already marking it on my list of Sedate Me’s Predictions Come True (in pencil).

  3. “My first question is to you, Newt. Do you know how fucking rich I am? Who cares what you think. Mitt, what kind of fucking name is that and why would you be better than me, since you’re not as smart? Forget it. You’re fired. Whatsyername, the broad with the crazy eyes, you’re ugly. Have you seen how hot all my wives are? Fuck you. Okay, looks like we’re out of time. Obviously, I’ll have to declare myself the winner.’

  4. Daniel gave me your blog site. I stayed up way too late last night! Keep writing Ken.

  5. Absolutely brilliant, but come on: no mention of Romney? Remember, we’ve got TWO Mormons in the race this time! And to be honest, if I had to choose one of them as a future president, I would say “fire” Romney and go with Huntsman, in large part because he unequivocally believes in “crazy” things like, you know, evolution and climate change. πŸ™‚

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