Who Says Republicans Ain’t Funny?

Newt Gingrich, until last weekend widely touted as The Smart Republican; an Idea Man, was considered a contender for the GOP nomination. Perhaps not the favourite, or at the top of the polls, but someone to be taken seriously…among Republicans, at least. Among Democrats and sane people, Newt was seen as a hypocritical blowhard; a craven opportunist, a liar, a serial adulterer, a homophobe, a racist…in pretty much all respects a typical Republican.

But then Newt went on Meet the Press and, in a move that shocked everyone, said something true: he savaged the vicious, ridiculous, idiotic budget proposal written by Paul Ryan – a proposal that just about every respectable economist, regardless of political stripe or school of thought, panned as the work of someone who doesn’t know anything about economics; a pathetic joke, entirely unworkable and harmful no matter how you slice it. The budget proposal was, of course, a HUGE hit with the Tea Party crowd – those fiscal conservatives who want to give tax breaks to the uber rich, subsidize Big Oil and gut the hell out of everyone else.

And so now they have turned on Newt. He is no longer the smart guy, or the experienced guy…now he’s the guy with no friends, no donors and a snowball’s chance in hell of turning it around. One minute he’s being booked on every show going – his most recent Meet the Press shot was number 35. For a guy who hasn’t held elected office since Ally McBeal was on TV, that’s something. He won’t be back, and not because they don’t want him but because the questions will now be, “Is it all over, Newt?” and, “Have you had any offers to teach, Newt?”

Of course, the GOP spin doctors are playing it like they never wanted Gingrich in the game to begin with. They’re trying to rebrand themselves as With it…Hip…In touch with America, and running away from a floundering Newt Gingrich is being sold as some sort of “Out with the old, in with the new!” or out with the Newt, at least.
God only knows what they’ll try to sell as new, though. Mitt Romney is still the odds on favourite, and he’s backed up by Batshit Crazy Michelle Bachmann, Frothy Rick Santorum, Tim Zzzzz Pawlenty…after that a Chinese speaking Mormon (that makes TWO Mormons for those keeping track) and an angry black guy. Sarah Palin must be torn between her own ego-maniacal “God wants me to do it” desire to run and every power broker in the party begging her not to destroy what remains of the Grand Old Party.

I digress. In any case, this made me laugh out loud:

Longtime Republican ad-maker and political consultant Alex Castellanos also called on the GOP to discard Gingrich in order to “release the past and inherit the future,” in an op-ed published by The Daily Caller, a conservative news site.

“The opponent Obama needs to run against, the only one he can beat, is the old, uncaring Republican,” Castellanos wrote. “It is not a caricature he needs to create. It lives, it walks, it breathes. It’s the Gingrich.”

Poor Castellanos. He thinks getting rid of Newt amounts to inheriting the future. The future of the Republican party was sold to knuckle-dragging theocrats, anti-abortion screamers, xenophobes, racists, homophobes, and a rainbow of various right wing single issue nutjobs long ago. They have come to collect and they will not be satisfied by anyone who might articulate anything remotely resembling sane, sober policies.
They did it to themselves. If they had anyone capable of defeating President Obama in a general election – and I don’t see that they do – that person could never win the nomination from the ratty, crazed gang of freaks they’ve invited into the tent.
Good on them, and good on the Gingrich.
Pass the popcorn.


3 Responses

  1. Newt had been the Republican’s long serving “leading intellectual” , a congressional leader and a FOX celeb. He’s actually been on Meet The Press more times than the fucking host! Yet the speed at which Newt was tossed into the human shredder was astounding. It was all over even before I heard about it. The dude will probably be lucky if he gets his old job back.

    And what was his crime? His biggest crime was that he made a moderate, semi-thoughtful, comment that questioned the current group-think. He said that social engineering of the right is no better than social engineering of the left. He also re-issued his 1990’s position on healthcare, which was perfectly fine at the time, the idea of a some kind of “mandated” health insurance. Albeit much “better” than Obama’s version of a mandate.

    This is a clear indication that even the Republican party of the 90’s is completely unacceptable to the Republicans of today. And as the Republicans go, the spineless Democrats will follow. They are just like Canada following the Americans. They may be a few laps of the bowl behind, but they’re still going down the toilet.

    It also serves as an example of the toxicity of the entire political process. Even Newt deserves much better than this. THAT’S how bad it is now. That’s how nasty & despicable the entire process has become.

    • What job? Newt thinks things up at his own think tank. He has no job beyond taking a slice of every dollar collected or donated.
      Fuckin’ eh. No room for speaking reasonably or saying anything even close to true in the GOP. Hasn’t been for years.
      Newt Gingrich deserves far worse than politics could ever dish out. If that rotten, soulless fucker were raped by a pack of rabid wolverines who were only doing it for the money to reconstitute ACORN and support gay marriage, it still wouldn’t be enough.

      • Job? Isn’t Newt employed at FOX? Yeah, maybe I should have put “job” in quotes. As for his leaky think tank, I’m sure the donations will dry up too now that he’s a political leper.

        It’s the speed and the permanency of the attack. All that time he’s put in and BLAM! Instant death with ONE comment. Nasty stuff, even for a scumbag like Newt.

        It’s like a scene from The Call of The Wild.

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