Sarah Palin’s Voice

It’s not just that words are strung together without much attention to what they mean, either singularly or in partnership; that there is an all too evident lack of thought, originality, intellect, insight, understanding or factual basis for the putrid word salad that spills from her lips like rancid coleslaw from an uncooperative Tupperware container in the glove box on a hot summer day, or even that the only motivating factor for her being anywhere, saying anything has absolutely nothing to do with any higher purpose, moral calling, ability to help or concern for country, but rather a craven, greedy, vicious, vengeful, petty, spiteful hunger for the spotlight and whatever pile of filthy lucre she can amass…
It’s that the very tone of her vocalizations – the SOUND, the inflection, the emphasis, the fat drawn out vowels welded to the dropped G’s and clipped diphthongs – simply screams MORON. Much like that cartoon dog with the insistent, “What are we gonna do now, Spike? Huh? Huh? What are we gonna do now? Huh, Spike? Huh?” or a caricature of a Downs child’s speech patterns…or even the way your idiot cousin’s voice still sticks in mind from way back when he said, “Let’s throw rocks at that hornet’s nest!” those many years ago…
The very sound of Sarah Palin’s voice simply screams IMBECILE. And so, one experiences a profound degree of cognitive dissonance almost immediately. Why are those people listening to her? Why are they applauding? It just doesn’t make sense!
The crowd is easy to explain. If you’ve ever heard cats in heat screaming in the night, you know what an unpleasant sound it is. Nevertheless, it draws every fucking cat for miles right into the same alley. Sarah Palin’s voice is the clarion call for idiots. Repulsive to thinking people, but irresistible to horny morons who want to hump the stupid.

Just a theory. Although it would be fun to test it. Could do something like how they test subsonic warning groans on herds of elephants.
Just bury some speakers under Wal-Mart parking lots, play random Sarah Palin audio clips, and watch the fat fuckers in “I’m with Stupid —>” tee shirts come streaming out of the store, glinting in the sun as they mindlessly scratch their crotch and look for a magic marker with which to misspell something on a big piece of Bristol board.

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5 Responses

  1. cousinavi, I know you’re not from states, but then the pied piper wasn’t from Hamelin. Just throwing that out there.

  2. The first for starters, the second if it comes to that.

  3. Repulsive to thinking people, but irresistible to horny morons who want to hump the stupid. – Cousinavi

    Yeah, it’s repulsive to the thinking side of me, but at the same time, it’s strangely luring to the horny moron side of me.

    I guess it’s a little like Jennifer Tilly.

  4. She reminds me a bit of Dubya in that regard.
    I refer to it as the over-enunciation of the simple-minded.
    She’s using words and ideas that are larger and more complicated than any she has used before, so she strains unnaturally when using them.
    There is also, of course, the effort to remind us that she’s just ordinary country folk, just like you Teabaggers. Hence the dropped G’s – which sound deliberate and contrived.

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