Michael Jackson Overkill

The Greatest Black Entertainer in the History of America?

Take a step back, take a breath and give your overwrought media pumped head a good long fucking shake.

I’m reposting the whole bit and sending notice to the author. THIS, you weeping moonwalking (stolen from Cab Calloway!) bastards! THIS!

QFT.

18 Reasons Sammy Davis Jr. Beats Michael Jackson in Heavenly Greatest Entertainer Who Ever Lived Smackdown

Wednesday, Jul. 8 2009 @ 4:21PM
By Matt Coker in A Clockwork Orange, Main

At Michael Jackson’s moving memorial in the Staples Center Tuesday, Motown founder Berry Gordy eulogized that the title “King of Pop” was not big enough for Jacko, calling him “simply the greatest entertainer that ever lived.”

Somewhere in Heaven, Sammy Davis Jr. fumes.

See, it’s been universally accepted that Sammy was the greatest entertainer who ever lived. Now that both he and MJ are sharing the bill at the Great Rendezvous Ballroom in the Sky, it behooves God, Thor, Vishnu, Devi Mahatmya or whichever non-mortal entity is in charge of the joint to organize a Supreme American Idol competition between the two. Shakespeare, Flo Ziegfeld and Judy Garland (the original Paula Abdul) can be the judges.

However, before such a competition is held, it behooves a thinking person to concede the many reasons (18 to be precise) that Sammy out-entertains Jacko. It’s really no contest.

1. Jacko was brutally pushed to perform by his father, but Sammy was brutally pushed to perform by his father in the mid 1920s. Do you know how audiences and promoters treated black entertainers in the mid 1920s? And to get around child labor laws, Davis had to live with being billed as “Silent Sam the Dancing Midget.”

2. Jacko performed with the disadvantage of one glove, but Sammy performed with the disadvantage of one eye.

3. Jacko sustained serious injuries while filming a Pepsi commercial in 1984, but Sammy was almost killed in an automobile accident–the 1954 crash in San Bernardino that resulted in that lost eye.

4. Jacko was a devout Jehovah’s Witness, but Sammy was a devout Jew. Count the number of great Jehovah’s Witness entertainers, the number of great Jewish entertainers and call me in the morning.

5. Jacko amazed audiences with his moonwalking skills, but Sammy amazed audiences with his tap-dancing skills. Do you know how hard it is to amaze anyone tap dancing?

6. Jacko’s pals were Corey Feldman, Macaulay Culkin and Emmanuel Lewis, but Sammy’s pals were Frank Sinatra, Dean Martin and Peter Lawford.

7. The Jack Pack’s honorary chick was Brooke Shields, but the Rat Pack’s honorary chick was Shirley MacLaine.

8. While Jacko and Sammy both won two NAACP awards for their off-stage humanitarian efforts, Davis was alone in being an actual NAACP award himself, which happened during an infamous “Summit at the Sands” show where Dean Martin picked up Sammy and announced to the crowd, “I’d like to thank the NAACP for this award.”

9. Jacko tried to acquire the Elephant Man’s bones, but Sammy boned Kim Novak.

10. Jacko broke the color barrier that had prevented MTV from showing videos by black artists in heavy rotation, but Sammy’s refusal to play at venues that forbid African-American entertainers from occupying their dressing rooms, restaurants and bars led to the integration of Miami nightclubs and Las Vegas casinos.

11. Jacko infamously faced more judges than he ever wanted to, but Sammy was a judge–complete with white wig, black robe and Good Book under his arm–during several Rowan & Martin’s Laugh-In skits in the 1960s.

12. Jacko famously kissed Lisa Marie Presley at the 1994 MTV Video Music Awards, but Sammy famously kissed Nancy Sinatra on the 1967 NBC Movin’ With Nancy special–possibly the first black-white kiss in U.S. television history.

13. The Jacko-Presley kiss was mocked as awkward and disturbing, but it had nothing on Sammy’s awkward and disturbing kiss on Archie Bunker’s cheek on All in the Family in 1972–and Sammy and Archie kissed each other years later on Archie Bunker’s Place. Ew!

14. Jacko sang the sappy theme song to Ben, but Sammy sang the sizzling theme song to Baretta.

15. Jacko hung out with Ronald and Nancy Reagan at the White House in 1984, but Sammy not only hung out with Richard Nixon there in 1973, Dick let him the spend the night, the first time it is believed an African-American had been invited to do so (excluding whoever Thomas Jefferson was secretly banging, of course).

16. Jacko sang the embarrassing “Say, Say, Say” with Paul McCartney, but Sammy appeared in the embarrassing Cannonball Run II with Burt Reynolds.

17. Jacko was portrayed in a TV miniseries by Jason Weaver, but Sammy was portrayed in an HBO movie by Don Cheadle.

18.
Sure, Berry Gordy called Jacko the greatest entertainer who ever lived, but 42 years earlier Sammy was forever immortalized as “The Greatest Entertainer in the World” in the I Dream of Jeannie episode of the same title. See, Tony needs Sammy to perform at Gen. Peterson’s 10th anniversary at NASA, but because Davis is previously booked Jeannie must create a duplicate of the greatest entertainer who ever lived . . .

sammydavisjr

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24 Responses

  1. I think your views are as out dated as you choice of music and entertainment.

    • That’s because you’re an ignorant little crotch spawn with no taste, no sense of history, and absolutely no idea what constitutes talent. You wouldn’t know a good dancer if he tapped up your front, over the top of your empty head and down your back. You wouldn’t know a singer with real ability if Billie Holiday lived next door, and what you think isn’t worth a stale fart in a wet paper bag. Now fuck off, you little bastard, before you get hunted down and stabbed for being too stupid to recognize your betters.
      What a surprise. Houston. Texas. Your Stetson’s on too tight, boy, and you got shit on your heels.
      Fuck off, kid…you bother me.

  2. It’s funny how people like kevind159 have to assert themselves and their little objections on people’s blogs about things as trivial as your music taste. Why don’t they just set up their own blog, like you did, to fulfill their need for expression and, yes admit it, a bit of attention. At least you’re up front about it. pussies.

    • I don’t do this for attention. I do this to let the pressure out. It has fewer consequences than murder.

  3. I am, for the moment, sort of sober. Under this unusual condition, let me cast a vote in favor of murder. Who cares what that motherfucker thinks about your tastes? And couldn’t he/she/it come up with a screen name that apparently more than 100 people hadn’t already claimed? Holy fuck. Tell me where he is. He’s a corpse. No easy way out , dickhead, I’m using a knife. Fuck that. Nail clippers. I’m a big, mean fucker, you asshole.

    • How big? I have nail clippers.
      This could get interesting just as a fucking pastime.
      Wose comes to worst, we walk away with one hell of a manicure.

    • Houston. But save yourself the trouble of disposal. People that stupid are best left to their own devices. Patience will grant all you wish. It’s like that old saying: What’s the best revenge on the man who steals your wife? Let him keep her.

  4. The cuz is stealing my ideas. First I turn you onto good music, then you post the sites I send you?

    You’re slippin’ Avi, you’re slippin’.

  5. I got a huge windbag MJ commentary in the works, but for now…

    Comparing Jacko to Sammy is like comparing white milk to chocolate milk.

    I can’t believe anybody would suggest a washed-up, 50 year old, kid-fucker like Jackson was somehow new and fresh. If Sammy was still alive, I’m sure he’d be doing much more interesting work than this clown with crock itch.

    Sammy was a committed black Jew. (Talk about the shit he must have had to put up with and he never had a Neverland ranch to hide out in) That is, except for a brief time in the early 70’s when he was doing coke and dabbled in Satanism (look for pictures with a red pinkie nail.)

    Sammy was a real fucking talent, not some mediocre fucking media whore that was force fed down our throats.

  6. Or how about James Brown?

    “Say it loud.
    I’M BLACK AND PROUD!”

    vs

    “It don’t matter if I make my black white.
    Diddle diddle. Diddle diddle-doo”

  7. I’m no shit six-foot-three, 280 pounds. Solid. I burn off the alcohol calories with bench presses. Consequently, I’ve had to abandon work for bench presses. Let me at that motherfucker. Is he in the states? Canada? Give me a clue. Is this my hosue?

  8. I think I meant “house,” but who can be sure? Don’t argue with me, no matter what.

  9. No, this isn’t my house. But this is now my second fucking computer.

  10. “Diddle diddle?” What the fuck is that guy talking about and where can I find him?

  11. I must agree with “sedate me”- what about “Soul Brother Number One”, “The Hardest Workin’ Man in Show Business” Can I hear an amen for Brother James Brown! YEAH!

  12. I’m comparing Sammy Davis Jr and James Brown to Micheal Jackson. If Jackson is the “greatest entertainer of all time”, he must stand head and shoulders above these two great entertainers. He doesn’t. The only thing he has over them is album sales. Jackson had talent, but his biggest talent was his ability to generate press with his freakishness.

    Because they worked in a very segregated medium and knew they could only sell so many records, Davis and Brown were more about the work than the record sales. They weren’t willing to turn themselves into whiteface clowns just to improve sales, yet Sammy probably did more to erode barriers than Jackson did. Jackson was just there at the right time to cash in.

    James Brown sang things like “Say it loud. I’m black and I’m proud!” encouraging his audience to be proud of themselves and their heritage. Jackson was more “be proud of my success.” His hardest hitting song was about how race shouldn’t matter, especially when you’re shopping for music. It’s almost as if Jackson made himself more white and more child-like so that white folk would find him less threatening than, say, NWA.

    He was white for the white audience, black for the black and crazy for the crazy obsessed press. It was just about getting paid so he could engage in his freakdom.

  13. Hell, don’t forget Stevie Wonder or Marvin Gaye or Chuck Berry or Aretha Franklin. I liked a couple of MJ’s songs, but I never understood his appeal, epsecially as he got creepier over the years.

  14. Where am I? Where did this second computer come from? Fuck it, I’m beating somebody into critical condition.

  15. Ray Charles is certainly in the mix. He was a great singer and was pretty good at comedy, but his dancing skills weren’t all that good.

  16. guys… can somebody help me? who is this sammy?

  17. anybody ??? who the fuck is sammy? i never knew of a musician who could come up to even Michael Jackson’s heel…. i’m guessing sammy is some local performer of America. is he?

    • So, you’re either too young to know any better, or suffer from the global malady of not being aware of any musical talent that has never been distributed to Japan and Brazil via MTV and television ads for soft drinks. Go figure.

      You never knew of a MUSICIAN that could come up to MJ’s heel, eh? Perhaps you could tell me what instrument Michael played. Asshole. You couldn’t name ANY musicians and don’t understand what the word means…but don’t let that stop you from presenting your personal stupidity as a considered opinion worthy of being heard and attended.

      If you can’t tell the difference between talent and marketing, that’s fine. But don’t come around here yammering nonsense based on brainless ignorance as if the fact that YOU haven’t heard of someone indicates other than you haven’t really heard of ANYTHING, you backward, inbred spooge stain.

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