The Consequences of Drinking Teabagger Tea

Soon, one or another of the brainless fuckwits who are sucking up courage and stoking their petulant outrage with this revolutionary teabag bullshit is going to DO something.
A sniping…a bombing…something ugly and bloody. They will leave a note – a “manifesto” – claiming to be a patriot who acted out of love of country, and urging other patriots to follow the clarion call to freedom. The words will quote Beck, Bachmann, Alex Jones…some of the more virulent pusheads…as inspiring them to have finally stood up for their rights. In the wingnut’s home, hidden among the rest of the ammunition and fertilizer, there will be a Michelle Malkin calender with the pages all dogeared and stuck together.
None of the foregoing ought to surprise anyone when it happens – and it will happen. I wonder, though, in the wake of it all, how these teabaggers will contort and dissemble to lay the blame for it at the feet of Obama.
“It wasn’t us. It was just some lone, isolated crazy person who snapped under the weight of Obama’s fascism, socialism, communism…but WE had nothing to do with it!”
THAT’S when we will have the fully justified opportunity to demonstrate to these yammering bastards just exactly what the vicious jackboot of righteous consequence feels like when it stomps on your spine.
Bachmann, Beck, Malkin et al – arrested, charged and tried for inciting treason, riot and mayhem. Let a jury decide if their Freedom of Speech is perfectly unrestricted, or if saying “Arm yourselves before Obama destroys America” is going too fucking far.

I often find that the best advice comes from Bugs Bunny (not joking). In this case, I offer the following quote: “Of course you know this means war.”
These backward fuckwits are not going to respond to facts. Case in point: The NRA was pushing the fiction that Obama has a 10-point plan to restrict and remove their guns. When the premise was thoroughly and completely debunked, they responded, “We choose to believe our facts.”
Shouting them down is a waste of time.
It’s much more like this: When you are standing in a bar, and a stupid, drunken asshole stares at you and says, “What the fuck are YOU lookin’ at?” there’s no point in replying.
You could say, “I’m not looking at anything,” or, “Hey man, I don’t want any trouble.” It doesn’t matter. Trouble has found you. You might as well just lace the fucker and keep swinging until he stops moving.
As for these teabagger bastards…they’re angry, frustrated, stupid and drunk on Beck’s Hard Koolaid. They’re LOOKING for a fight, and I’m not the sort of person who takes well to being threatened by small gangs of stupid delinquent rednecks.
If it’s a fight they want, well then…I say kick the ever-loving shit out of them. Hit them three ways: Hard, fast and repeatedly. Don’t stop until the fight is won and there is no one left on the other side willing to stand up and shout treasonous nonsense in the public square.
The time for “time outs” and rational discussion with these tantrum throwing children is over. It’s time for a sound damn spanking…a trip to the woodshed. A solid and unforgettable whipping.

It comes down to the legal principle of the reasonable man.
So far, the gangs of drunken louts have mostly been milling about agreeing with one another that they’ve been hard done by…that things just ain’t right. They’ve shouted some inflammatory bullshit and tried to screw up their courage by pretending there’s more of them than there really are. But, so far, they haven’t really set foot on our lawn, broken any windows or torched our car. Wading into the middle of them with a 2×4 with nails sticking out of the business end would have to be considered a disproportionate response.
Sadly, and despite the certainty of that rock coming through the window and killing baby Junior, we’re gonna have to wait until putting them in the hospital can be deemed a reasonable response in defense of self and others.
Get your stick with nails in it ready. It will be needed.


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