Palin Cites ACORN – Dems Trying to Steal Election!

This stupid, vicious bitch has got to go.  I know lying is second nature for the GOP – they’ll say and do goddamn near anything to win an election – but there used to be a distinction between shading and mild distortion and outright bold-faced bullshit…or was there?  If there wasn’t, there should be.

Now that it looks more and more like they’re going to lose the white house, and their attempts at racist, fear-mongering bullshit flopped like McCain’s right arm, they’re setting the stage to argue that it is not their pathetic campaign and reprehensible record, but rather that their well deserved and long overdue stomping at the polls will be the result of voter fraud.

The problem with this is that it’s a lie.
It is not true.  It is an absolute, unmitigated bit of utter horseshit and Sarah Palin either knows that (in which case she’s a filthy fucking liar) or she doesn’t (in which case she’s too fucking stupid to be on the ticket).  I have no problem with either of those propositions.

ACORN (Association of Community Organizations for Reform Now) is concerned with registering voters.  This cycle, they have allegedly registered 1.3 million low income and minority voters – obviously not voters the GOP wants to see at the polls in November.  This is the group that the GOP cites in making the case that rampant voter fraud may steal this election from them.  ACORN is in the bag for Obama, and they’re gaming the system with phony votes!

Here’s the rub:  ACORN uses some volunteers and some paid personnel to help voters fill out the registration forms.  Some of those workers are paid on a per form basis – the more they complete, the more money they make.  Obviously, this leaves the system wide open to fraudulent registrations being submitted.  There has been confirmed evidence of false information being submitted on some forms – names of pro football players, “John Q. Public,” and such.

Here’s the counter rub:  ACORN is obligated by law to turn in every form, no matter what’s written on it.
Let me say that again:  ACORN must turn in every completed form no matter whose name is on it.  It could say George Washington, Little Miss Muffet, Bugs Bunny or Fuck Fuckity Fuckerstone and ACORN is obligated under the law to submit that form to the registrar.

ACORN goes to great trouble to identify and flag any voter registration form they deem questionable.  One supposes that “Fuck Fuckity Fuckerstone” would get flagged, while perhaps the one filled out in NFL quarterback Tony Romo’s name might be a little more likely to slip through.   Hunter Thompson is no longer scrutinizing the registration forms.
The fact remains that some fraudulent registrations get submitted.  Occasionally some of those show up on the voter lists.  ACORN has helped the authorities identify and prosecute those responsible for submitting false forms – not what you’d expect from an organization out to commit fraud.

Here’s the rub against the grain:  Despite the fact that some fraudulent forms get submitted, and perhaps even added to the voter rolls, there has never been a confirmed case of any of these fraudulent names showing up anywhere to vote.  Let’s be clear about this:  There is not, never has been, and it is exceedingly unlikely that in this coming election anyone will identify even a single case of voter fraud.  Miss Muffet, Bugs Bunny, and Mr. Fuckingstone simply never come to the polls and insist on casting a ballot.

The last notable case of voter fraud identified in the United States was Ann Coulter, who tried to lie about her address so she could vote in another precinct.  Nevertheless, the GOP – and Sarah Palin specifically – cite these dodgy registration forms as proof that the scary, left-wing fuckers (read Democrats) are out to steal this election by cheating!
Given these two facts:  The only case of voter fraud anyone can name was committed by the most hardcore GOP fascist they’ve got, and they’re alleging voter fraud, what are the odds the fraudulent forms turned in to ACORN were filled out by GOP plants?
Which seems more likely:  That John Q. Public and Little Miss Muffet will turn up to vote, with ID, and no one will raise an eyebrow, or that Karl Rove needs an issue to scare the fuck out of people?
They’ve done the terror threat to death – can’t pull that one again…it might backfire in any case.  There’s no telling what that PTSD wildman POW McCain will decide to do in a red alert!
But THIS!  This might be an excellent way to restrict the voting process, exercise tighter control over the voting lists and argue for increased scrutiny at the polls.

What ought to be far more troubling to those concerned with fair and free elections is the lengths to which the GOP will go to disenfranchise legitimate voters.
If your name is the same as someone convicted of a felony, you may expect to be challenged at the polls.
If you currently live in a home that has had foreclosure proceedings filed against it, you may expect to be challenged for residency.
If you cannot produce photo ID – which is absolutely not a requirement under the law – you may expect to be challenged in some states.
The GOP has been behind some of the shadiest, most underhanded tactics in electoral history (and most commonly in swing states…surprise, surprise) to keep poor and minority voters from casting a ballot on election day.
When George Bush won Florida in 2000, tens of thousands of black votes were not counted as a direct result of such dirty plots.  And yet, Sarah Palin is yammering her vapid, empty, ignorant head off about how the leftist groups are trying to steal this election with vote fraud.
These dirty fuckers are out to WIN this election BY ANY MEANS POSSIBLE.

The media is not even bothering to properly investigate or report this story with anything remotely resembling competence.  CNN is running stories on an investigation into the fraudulent ballots as if ACORN is responsible for submitting them despite the fact that they are merely following the law – ACORN is not allowed NOT to turn them in.
The yammering lipflaps in Atlanta even go so far as to suggest, despite the total lack of any evidence of voter fraud, that it looks like voter fraud might be a problem!  It’s nothing more than a complete abdication of journalistic responsibility and a sycophantic repetition of another horseshit GOP talking point.

There’s a big difference between voter registration fraud, and voter fraud…and Sarah Palin is either (as I said) too stupid to know the difference or willfully ignorant and all too happy to use this bit of bullshit to incite further fear, hatred and suspicion among the GOP base, and lay the groundwork for a blanket excuse as to why she – the most qualified Mavericky dingbat in the history of American politics – did not win the vice presidency.

Having been unable to make anything else work, including veiled references to Obama “palling around with terrorists” (plural), ginning up racism and hatred, yammering about abortion, flailing about the economy, repeating the words, “Maverick, you betcha,” over and over again…finding nothing but contempt and frustration at every turn and refusing to admit that those are simply proper responses to the McCain-Palin ticket, she’s now accusing the Democrats of outright cheating even before a single ballot has been cast.

Where’s the moose meat, oh Wicked Witch of Wasilla?  If you’re going to assert that someone is cheating, you’d better have some fucking proof.  And registration forms submitted with false names when (a) ACORN is obligated to submit them in any case, and (b) there has never been a confirmed case of voter fraud, does not make the cut.  Either put up or shut the fuck up and get back to your pointless flailing about.

Sorry to break this to you, Sarah…but in a democracy, citizens get to vote.  Not just the rich ones, not just the white ones, not just the creationist, ant-abortion freakazoids that think you’re just the most down-to-earth thing since Jesus rode a dinosaur.  ALL citizens of voting age are entitled to vote (in their districts and so long as they are not convicted felons).
ACORN signed up about 1.3 million voters who want to send your shallow Miss Congeniality Caribou Barbie ass back to Alaska.  Too fucking bad for you and Senator Gimpy McMumblefuck.
While you’re learning to live with the simple fact that you don’t get to pick and choose who may vote, try reading something besides every newspaper in America.  Take a break and have a browse through the Constitution and some of those Supreme Court cases with which you’re so familiar.  Some of them deal with voting rights.   Then, the next time Katie Couric asks you a penetrating question about which decisions you disagree with, instead of staring blankly like a moose in the headlights, you’ll be able to go on at great length about how, “…it’s just wrong there for this law to allow then permit and there black and poor brown people with no money and not white like you and I see things there can just vote here in this country, dontcha know!”

UPDATE: Even the Brits get it.  Why is the American media (I’m looking at YOU, Wolf…you’ve been warned!) NOT dissecting this story?  This is the whole game!  Coming to a polling booth near you!  Have your photo ID ready, you fucking hippies.


19 Responses

  1. This is a righteous piece of work my friend and I salute you for writing it. I am a devoted fan forever and ever. Now what’s really going to be interesting is whether the testimony of David Iglesias is going to staple Gonzales balls to the wall. I dare say that the firing of these US Attorneys will be a real stinky corpse once all the facts are laid open and souls are bared. As you know they are also trying to hang the mortgage meltdown on ACORN as well. They claim ACORN is responsible for the deregulation of the mortgage industry. Apparently no one seems to remember the open discrimination the lending institutions were involved in not so long ago called redlining. It is such an utter pile of shit it baffles my mind to even try to understand how they think they can pull it off. However, they haven’t had to really disguise their mischief have they?

  2. This is a righteous piece of work my friend and I salute you for writing it. I am a devoted fan forever and ever.

    I have no idea what came after that.
    (Buffing nails on shirt)

  3. Great post, mate. I bow before you.

    Apologies if you’ve run this already, but there’s a hilarious vid doing the rounds of McCain sucking up to Acorn in 2006. He just *loves* those poor immigrants. Or he did then.

  4. cousinavi,

    does your boyfriend ask you to where that gay hat??

    if anyone can help to me find more gay thing to boyfriend me email

  5. The hat’s not gay, Joe…and you and your “partner” can get one from the same aboriginal tribe who made mine. They’re in the mountains near Miaoli, and they would not be offended at all if you and your butt-buddy dropped by to do a little shopping.

  6. aborigiwhat??? sorry i don’t English good. is that something gay thing i would like?? im sure not like black things. i hate black people . this is OBAMANATION now
    Email me at

  7. OK, Gay Joe…that’s two stupid comments. If I knew where you were, I’d make a point of stompin’ you half to death just for fun (you’re too stupid to teach, and I don’t care if you learn…but kicking you up and down the street would be fun).
    Crawl back into your imbecilic cave, or get the fuck off my planet, but either way you’re done posting here, fuckwit.

  8. New Note to Gay Joe:

    While I appreciate your redoubled efforts to acquire a boyfriend, Joe, I must remind you that I’m strictly hetero and even if I weren’t, you’re far too stupid and ill-bred to be considered for anything other than a severe beating.

    To that end, you pathetic hunk of eel shit, I’m in Taiwan. If you’re ever in the neighbourhood and want to be beaten up and down the street like your Momma’s red-headed stepchild, let me know.

  9. Last Note to Gay Joe:

    No, Joe…Taiwan is nowhere near Pensacola. Sorry. If you want your beating (you sick little masochist), you’ll have to start peddling your tricycle immediately.
    Although, I’m sure you can find some wonderful sailors right there in your neighborhood. Some to make you giddy with poofty delight over their jaunty hats, and others to inflict upon you the severe pounding you so obviously need.

    Now…last time (since it hasn’t dawned on you yet): I’m not going to post your racist hate screeds, OR your pathetic pleas to find a big, burly gay man, OR your whiney, bitchy little insults in a vain effort to provoke someone into beating you almost to death.

    I will post your email again tho:
    He’s in the Pensacola area, kids. If you can hunt him up, I’m sure you can make good use of him (one way or another). Play safe, tho…I get the impression Joe frequents truck stops and airport stalls – sort of a Larry Craig with a taste for the old “slap me harder” game.

  10. I am appalled at the shear ignorance of the voters in the election. I expect to wake up that grey morning in January and walk out of my door to find the communist manifesto tacked to my front door. Why would anyone vote into office a bad clone of Karl Marx?

    I am not sure where the idiot that wrote this article got some of his information ( other than the left wing times) that he counts as credible. I would not be shocked in the least if this guy was conceived during the third reich by artificial insemination of the NSDAP. Anyone who can agree with the beliefs of obama, and better yet “put” him in office should be revoked of the right to vote and put into Castro’s Cuba.

  11. @ Grimm

    Nice to see reason and clear thinking on the side that voted in Bush and now laments the loss of a doddering, senile warmonger and his vapid, incompetent, racist Barbie doll.
    Clearly you have never read Marx and have no idea what the term “communism” means. You should resist the urge to toss epithets you don’t understand – it only reveals your ignorance (as if the ad hominem that pervades your comment weren’t enough).
    Anyone who considers that not toeing the neocon line scratched out by fuckwits like Doug Feith ought to be booted out of the country has NO IDEA what America is about. Have you ever bothered to read the Constitution before attending your local Klan meeting?
    The information, should you care to check the bona fides or strength of same, is all linked from within the bit, you blithering, ignorant fuckwit. Try reading up a bit before you come stumbling in here again with your foolish bullshit. No doubt you’re one of Gay Joe’s Pensacola truck stop pals.

  12. I am not quiet sure why you throw the race card around about this issue. You assume that because I disagree with the socialist policies of obama, that I supported the republican party. Maybe you should do some reading and less padding your article before opening your mouth. If anyone has shown ignorance of this issue, it is clearly you.

    I guess that you are one of the idiotic millions that will be lining up to collect your handouts that I have to work and pay for, or maybe you will just be one of the mailbox watchers that sit around all day and complain as to how bad you have it.

    I am not bitter as to the democrats winning the election, I am ill at the multitude of morons that voted him in.

  13. @ Moron Grimm

    Lot’s of blithering and yammering – no facts.
    Exactly HOW are Obama’s policies “socialist”?
    That you toss words around without (and rather obviously not) knowing WHAT THEY MEAN only makes you look stupid. No doubt that requires very little effort on your part, but you could try harder.
    About what have I shown ignorance? The allegation that there was ANY voter fraud (especially as relates to ACORN) is just foolish. Since you assert that I need to do some reading, what is it (in your obviously considered opinion – you are clearly an educated man) I ought to read?
    If YOU want to learn about it, you could start by reading Lithwick, or check out any of the non-partisan academics who have examined the issue, OR even the GOP’s own experts on the matter of voter fraud. You haven’t (again obviously) and you won’t because there’s nothing the truly stupid avoid more than facts.

    Race? You mean the Klan reference? Look, fuckwit…YOU’RE the one who asserts that Obama supporters ought to be shipped off to Cuba. Does that seem to you, in your urbane, informed and considered opinion, the sort of thing someone who supports the Constitution would suggest? Have you ever read it?

    What fucking handouts? And I highly doubt you work. You sound like like some ignorant redneck freeper who’s got at least one car up on blocks in the front yard and takes a small cut of your Pensacola pal’s truck stop change. Handouts that YOU pay for? LMAO.

    What is it that makes choosing a Harvard law grad over a crash test dummy who cannot distinguish between a Sunni and a Shiite; presents a scattershot economic policy based on which way the wind is blowing that even HIS OWN economic advisers say won’t work; an energy policy based on the ignorant ravings of a beauty pageant runner-up; a tax policy that tumbled out of the brainless skull of an idiot faux plumber who hasn’t even got a plumber’s license, owes back taxes and LIES, such a bad decision?

    I understand you rolled in here to support your Pensacola truck stop bathroom stall buddy Joe, but if you’re gonna attempt political argument, being stupid and angry about it is no way to start.
    As for reading, when you get finished with the remedial program that allows you to grasp the meaning of words with more than two syllables (like SOCIALISM and COMMUNISM – words you obviously fail to understand and only despise because the cool guys at the Klan meetin’ use them there words when theys talkin’ ’bout thet thar negrah fella), come on back and try for REAL argument – like a big boy.

    I’m about done with your petty, ignorant, snake handling redneck backwater rants of blithering stupidity. You don’t deserve any more attention until you learn to think before you let your brainlessness loose.

  14. Can’t tell whether I’m mad or just bored.

  15. Definitely frustrated.

  16. Frustrated. There are too many imbeciles in this world. I would post the evidence…Gay Joe and his butt buddy Grimm have taken to repeated comments.
    They ought to have grokked to it by now – none of it gets posted.
    And yet…
    Great googly moogly – I’d kill the stupid given the chance. I would. All of them. Joe and Grimm and all their kin.

  17. For Greedy Blowjobs at any truckstop near Pensacola
    Email Gay Joe

    Greedy, greasy and only a quarter.

  18. Joe loves my hat. He offered to do really depraved things while crowds of onlookers paid loose change to watch in order to get a hat just like it.

  19. […] Wolf Blitzer and the gang down at CNN Asia, Ann Coulter (although no one has seen her lately), a couple of commenters on me wee blog, drivers around the roads of Taiwan…had a lovely encounter with the folks at […]

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