12 Hours to “WHARGARBL!” Palin Predictions

Palin is the dumbest thing to ever attempt American presidential politics.
Dumber even than Dubya, and that’s saying something.
Nevertheless, Biden is up against it in this debate.
He can’t attack her for fear of seeming like a sexist woman beater.
He can’t argue with her – to do so would legitimize her blithering foolishness.
And Palin is not going to answer a single question. No matter what Ifil asks, Palin will simply yammer rehearsed talking points:

“I just think that it’s time Washington has somebody come down there…someone with some small town common sense, dontcha know, and get them to pay attention to the things we all need out here in small town America – lower taxes, better jobs, good education for our children. This financial crisis we’re in the middle of wasn’t created by the hard workin’, honest, God fearin’ Americans I know! It was created by a bunch of highly educated, elite, greedy Ivy League types who only had their own self-interest in mind. Seems to me, the more book learnin’ you have, the more hurt you cause America. Well I’m not so much int’rested in what all those (finger quotes) educated types (close finger quotes) say America needs. I’m int’rested in what AMERICANS say they want…and what Americans tell me is that they’ve had enough of big speeches and hollow talk. They want someone who has proven they know how to put their country first. Someone like John McCain, who has sacrificed more than anyone knows for his country, and is ready, willing and able to roll up his sleeves and get to work keepin’ America the strongest country in the world!” (Cute smile / Nose wrinkle)

Over to Biden. I predict lengthy wind, a gaffe here and there, and the moderator having to ring the bell on his inability to finish within the 90 seconds allotted.

IF Palin stutters something nonsensical, it would be perfectly appropriate to take a full 10 seconds or so for a WTF? Face.
But in the face of heavily prepped, fairly delivered, folksy down home common sense platitudes mixed in with the most vicious, ugly, racist, xenophobic and fear-mongering attacks on Obama, Biden will be forced to say something.
I just hope he doesn’t take the bait and try to defend Obama. Obama’s a big boy and can stand up for himself…has done so exceptionally well over the past two years.  He predicted withering personal attacks – Biden should let him be right about that.
The only road for Joe is to state facts:  Republican misfeasance, malfeasance and nonfeasance (specifically, in order, the economy, Iraq and New Orleans); John McCain’s flip-flopping pretensions to competence; the Obama/Biden plan: Details and good judgment…far better than the alternative presented by Ms. Palin and her running mate.
If Caribou Barbie can manage to stick to the script Karl Rove writes for her, good for her. Give her a gold star and buy her a fuckin’ ice cream cone. Just don’t engage the blithering twit.  She hasn’t earned the right to be on that stage, and ought not be given the credit of a direct response to anything that spills out of her incompetent Miss Congeniality trap.

While I would love NOTHING more than to witness a stuttering, blank, shallow, twisted heap of fail oozing out of Sarah Palin, I don’t think we’re going to get it. I hope for it, and will dance around my living room, shouting and whooping with a degree of schadenfreudy joy liable to scare the fuck outta my Taiwanese neighbours if I get it.
But do not be surprised if Palin hits all the high notes, does not faceplant into the lecturn, and comes outta this dance with Uncle Joe with the pundit’s jaws on the floor, sputtering how she knocked it outta the park.


2 Responses

  1. I’m also an Obama supporter, and that’s pretty much my take on this debate too.

  2. I was…we were…WRONG.

    Biden ROCKS. Joe…you fuckin’ ROCK, man!

    Baseline, net, in the paint, outside jumpers, dunks, dekes, speed and finesse.
    Do not fuck with the Biden.

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