Fuck Florida

As if the argument currently happening in the dangling limp American dick that is Florida over whether or not to teach creationism in the science curriculum – “Teach the controversy!” – is not proof enough that those brain dead twits ought not be consulted about anything, ever, now they want to stage yet another Democratic primary vote.

The weak bastards, sick of the nomination commonly being a done deal by the time they got to exercise their ballot, decided to flip the finger at the DNC and move the date of their primary in a vain effort to matter.  The DNC told them if they did so their delegates would not count nor be seated at the convention.  Florida went ahead and did it anyway.

Now, it would seem, those backward fucktards are going to get their wish.  In a race that will not end, states that hold their primaries later in the schedule are carrying previously unimaginable weight.  Puerto Rico is fucking giddy with delight – they’ve never had Anderson Cooper over for a visit before…well, except for that one time when the leather bar had the Village People for a long weekend engagement.
And Florida?  They want a do-over.  They (and Hillary, who needs to pick up delegates the way a coke freak needs to score at 4AM) have suddenly become more determined than ever to exercise the power they crave and broke rules to try and exert.

Hillary, the shrill, conniving, Machiavellian demon of doom that she is, wants the results from the last go certified.  Of course she does.  Having been the only Democrat on the ballot in Michigan (a state of affairs which she apparently considers to have resulted in a fair outcome) and the only candidate to have campaigned in Florida, daily touts how important it is to have those votes count.   Yeah, Hillary Rodham Clinton is all about democracy and fairness, except when that would favour Obama (who has won more votes, more delegates and more states). 
I’m sure she would have preferred to have been the only candidate on the ballot in every state.  Sadly for the Clintonistas, in most states where it was possible to vote for someone else people did so, and by wide margins (unlike those few states where she managed to squeak out a win).

So, to recap:  In order to carry more weight, Florida decided to move up the date of their primary vote in contravention of the rules.  The process was patently unfair and legally meaningless.  Now that the ballots they could not wait to cast, which were dismissed by the party, obviously carry extraordinary weight given the nature and status of the race for the nomination, they want to spend 12 million dollars to do it all over again.

Did America learn nothing in 2000?  Hanging chads, biased Governor, disenfranchised African American voters – an entire election fucked up over their inability to get anything resembling an accurate count.  That anyone would even consider letting these flagrant rule violating morons have anything to do with elections for anything more significant than municipal dogcatcher amazes me.
Cuban exiles, geriatric snowbirds and Young Earth Creationists.  These are the folks you’re going to invest with the power to determine the outcome of a hard fought and closely contested primary?  After they broke the rules to have more power, had their delegates stripped, the DNC is going to reward them by giving them determinative power?

Whiskey Tango Foxtrot?

I say FUCK FLORIDA.  In 2012 they can follow the rules like everyone else and their votes will count.  This time around, sorry…no do-overs…no mulligans…no, “Oops, sorry…we’re going to matter now.”

And as far as Hillary Rodham Clinton is concerned (as if there weren’t already a mountain of evidence to convince any thinking person that fairness and democracy are the furthest things from her mind in her power-hungry, grasping, self-entitled bid for the office she arrogantly believes is her due), until she stops vacillating like a fucking metronome and demonstrates that she understands the idea of fairness and puts it into practice, she has no business running for dogcatcher, much less POTUS.  How about when we redo those primaries – the ones Hillary is so proud of winning – we leave HER name off the ballot?
Good for the gander, good for the goose, eh Hillary?


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