Pfft. What a gyp.
Got up this morning, ran downstairs to see what Jesus had left for me under the Rapture Tree. Nothing.
Went outside. Thought Jesus had brought me socks and underwear but scattered them all over the neighborhood. Turns out that wasn’t the case…wasn’t even evidence of the hoped for missing Christians. Neighbor’s clothesline broke.
I waited all day for the massive earthquake. With each passing hour, I became more and more frustrated. Around dinner time, I began mocking believers. “Take your pick, Jesus boy! No god, or YOU’RE no good!”
Turns out mocking believers is fun, and the more one drinks the more fun it is.
I’ve decided to have another rapture next week. Might even make it a regular thing.
Pfft. What a gyp.
As if giving the world George W. Bush weren’t proof enough that dangerously stupid things come from Texas, there’s another skirmish shaping up on the Evolution versus “God Done It” front.
It’s one thing to be so stubbornly ignorant and willfully blind to deny the fact of evolution, but the cretins in the Lone Star state insist on confusing evolution with abiogenesis.
Evolution is the process of mutation and natural selection that explains speciation – the diversity of life on this planet. Abiogenesis is the mechanism by which life formed in the first place.
The imbecilic boneheads down in Sam Houston country insist that ‘Life couldn’t just come from nuthin’ so god musta dunnit.’
Of course, no one argues that life came from nothing, but the problem is that where life came from – how those first replicating molecules formed – has nothing whatsoever to do with evolution which is a demonstrable fact and supported by more than enough evidence to send someone to death row in that very same state.
It doesn’t phase them even a little bit that scientists have managed to create DNA and RNA in the lab, they still engage in the infinite recursion of, “Well, what caused THAT?” And it will not matter when science provides excellent evidence answering their question…they’ll just repeat the question. The prime mover, the first cause, whatever it was, MUST be god…and not just any god – no muskrat putting earth on the back of the turtle for these insistently stupid assholes. No sir. It was Jesus. They know it, and they want it taught in the science classroom.
Tony Blair and Christopher Hitchens debated the question of whether religion is a force for good. As anyone who has ever debated Hitchens might tell you, the only way to win a debate with Hitchens is not to play…but as Hitchens would remind you, that ain’t winning. There may be a few with the intellectual capacity, and a handful possessed of sufficient rhetorical style, but no one plays at both ends of the court like Hitch.
As the BBC reports, and as might have been expected, Hitch carried the day by a 2-1 margin. Of course, he did have the advantage of being right.